Hair's a Cause You Don't Hair Much About

[G-Fafif]

Somebody wants David Wright to grow a mustache.[/url:2mk0k1wj]

[Guest Edgy DC]

Rating Metstaches*:

*These are certainly not the top 10, but each player picted is a solid typifyer of the level. Steve Henderson's handlehooky thing, on a better day, would rank as a 6 alongside his teammate Ray Burris. Lee Mazzillli's 1981 disaster could be arguably as low as 2 or as high as 4. I wouldn't be of a mind to be generous, however.

10) Keith Hernandez	9) Craig Swan	8) Jose Valentin
7) Howard Johnson	6) Davey Johnson	5) Ray Burris
4) Derek Bell	3)Terry Leach	2) Wally Backman
	1) Tim Foli

If there's a lesson, it's that pitchers tend to have the best soup strainers, and middle infielders the worst. Catchers don't typically qualify, because their staches tend to explode out of a scruffy neglect. Obviously, there are plenty of exceptions.

Using this 1-10 scale, rank the following Metstaches:

1) Piazza's handelbar?

2) Rick Cerone's front hedge?

3) Vince Coleman's boomerang?

4) Ron Gardenhire's cheese doodle residue?

5) Terry Bross's modular end table?

6) Jeff McKnight's tickler?

7) Pat Zachry's post-beard remainder?

8) Luis Alvardo's sadistic prison guard special?

9) Lute Barnes' mail-order suburban derelict?

10) Don Aase's beer foam absorbant device?

Bonus 11) Bobby Valentine's do-it-yourselfer?

[dgwphotography]

="G-Fafif":3cbyxhzr]Somebody wants David Wright to grow a mustache.[/url:3cbyxhzr][/quote:3cbyxhzr] He's using my fireworks image in his header...

Edgy DC Mar 19 2009 07:20 PM

Time to get Matt Murdock on the case.

LeiterWagnerFasterStrongr Mar 19 2009 07:39 PM

Since 'Nova's pulled away... will do! 1) 6. 2) 4. 3) 8. Surprisingly stately... and by no means reflective of the wearer. 4) 5. A nice Magnum... a 'stache for its time; like Brawny Man's less brawny brother. 5) 3. 6) 2. Weirdly wispy... and DEFINITELY reflective of the wearer. 7) 4. A bit too meaty for the man. 8) 9. Si! 9) 5. Meh. 10) 7. A tidy Wild-Westy throwback. Bonus 11) 2 for aesthetics. On the balls meter? Like Nigel Tufnel's amp, this one goes to 11.

Edgy DC Mar 19 2009 07:56 PM Edited 1 time(s), most recently on Mar 21 2009 10:27 AM

Thanks for playing. I was going to call boochit on number four. It thought garden hose had the typical Statutory Rape moustache of the punchless middle infielder. But then I saw it paired up with this wind-blown mullet, and damned if Gardy doesn't make it work a little bit.

LeiterWagnerFasterStrongr Mar 19 2009 08:08 PM

="Edgy DC":3cpa7yyw]Thanks for playing. I was going to call boochit on number four. It thought garden hose had the typical statutory rape moustache of the punchless middle infielder. But then I saw it paired up with this wind-blown mullet, and damned if Gardy doesn't make it work a little bit. [/quote:3cpa7yyw] IN RETROSPECT: Less "Magnum," more "Magnum TA." (Or Arn Anderson, if you prefer.) cooby Mar 21 2009 10:22 AM You should have included ALex Trevino, he looked really cute with a mustache. Edgy DC Mar 21 2009 10:46 AM Well, join in and post the man. I'd say he's a solid eight, pushing nine. The full Tony Orlando happening there. cooby Mar 21 2009 02:03 PM Wasn't he a cutie? dgwphotography Mar 21 2009 03:51 PM ="LeiterWagnerFasterStrongr"] IN RETROSPECT: Less "Magnum," more "Magnum TA." (Or Arn Anderson, if you prefer.) Actually, I think Gardenhire = Thunderlips - Steroids SteveJRogers Mar 21 2009 05:23 PM How about ranking Mets who once rocked 'staches for a brief period: Ron Hodges Ed Kranepool Bud Harrelson Eh, not going to find it right now, but Edgy, put up that pic of Buddy with a cute puppy in his glove Edgy DC Mar 21 2009 09:08 PM Short time moustaches are welcome to be ranked. Several of those already noted were short-timers. What isn't rankable are Metstaches that are part of full-on beards. Buddy, is a solid two, but Fido gets a six: Most short-timers have the ranking disadvantage of the Metstache look as being so jarringly removed from the face we're used to, that it's hard for the player to get buy-in from the rankers. For instance, is anything not wrong with this photo? seawolf17 Mar 27 2009 12:29 PM I want. http://www.planetofthegeeks.com/?p=134 MFS62 Mar 27 2009 12:50 PM Gardenhire's 'stache wasn't that bad. Maybe because the color was lighter than the others. Later metirish Mar 27 2009 12:56 PM DocTee Mar 27 2009 02:20 PM For a second, i thought that was Frank Viola. metirish Apr 02 2009 05:20 PM This is starting to get annoying on FB. A Boy Named Seo Apr 02 2009 05:48 PM Was thinking the same shit just today. metirish Apr 02 2009 06:03 PM Dumped A Boy Named Seo Apr 02 2009 07:10 PM I cut 'em, too.

[Guest Edgy DC]

Time to get Matt Murdock on the case.

[Guest LeiterWagnerFasterStrongr]

Since 'Nova's pulled away... will do!


1) 6.

2) 4.

3) 8. Surprisingly stately... and by no means reflective of the wearer.

4) 5. A nice Magnum... a 'stache for its time; like Brawny Man's less brawny brother.

5) 3.

6) 2. Weirdly wispy... and DEFINITELY reflective of the wearer.

7) 4. A bit too meaty for the man.

8) 9. Si!

9) 5. Meh.

10) 7. A tidy Wild-Westy throwback.

Bonus 11) 2 for aesthetics. On the balls meter? Like Nigel Tufnel's amp, this one goes to 11.

[Guest Edgy DC]

Thanks for playing. I was going to call boochit on number four. It thought garden hose had the typical Statutory Rape moustache of the punchless middle infielder. But then I saw it paired up with this wind-blown mullet, and damned if Gardy doesn't make it work a little bit.

[Guest LeiterWagnerFasterStrongr]

="Edgy DC":3cpa7yyw]Thanks for playing. I was going to call boochit on number four. It thought garden hose had the typical statutory rape moustache of the punchless middle infielder. But then I saw it paired up with this wind-blown mullet, and damned if Gardy doesn't make it work a little bit. [/quote:3cpa7yyw] IN RETROSPECT: Less "Magnum," more "Magnum TA." (Or Arn Anderson, if you prefer.)

cooby Mar 21 2009 10:22 AM

You should have included ALex Trevino, he looked really cute with a mustache.

Edgy DC Mar 21 2009 10:46 AM

Well, join in and post the man. I'd say he's a solid eight, pushing nine. The full Tony Orlando happening there.

cooby Mar 21 2009 02:03 PM

Wasn't he a cutie?

dgwphotography Mar 21 2009 03:51 PM

="LeiterWagnerFasterStrongr"] IN RETROSPECT: Less "Magnum," more "Magnum TA." (Or Arn Anderson, if you prefer.) Actually, I think Gardenhire = Thunderlips - Steroids

SteveJRogers Mar 21 2009 05:23 PM

How about ranking Mets who once rocked 'staches for a brief period: Ron Hodges Ed Kranepool Bud Harrelson Eh, not going to find it right now, but Edgy, put up that pic of Buddy with a cute puppy in his glove

Edgy DC Mar 21 2009 09:08 PM

Short time moustaches are welcome to be ranked. Several of those already noted were short-timers. What isn't rankable are Metstaches that are part of full-on beards. Buddy, is a solid two, but Fido gets a six: Most short-timers have the ranking disadvantage of the Metstache look as being so jarringly removed from the face we're used to, that it's hard for the player to get buy-in from the rankers. For instance, is anything not wrong with this photo?

seawolf17 Mar 27 2009 12:29 PM

I want. http://www.planetofthegeeks.com/?p=134

MFS62 Mar 27 2009 12:50 PM

Gardenhire's 'stache wasn't that bad. Maybe because the color was lighter than the others. Later

metirish Mar 27 2009 12:56 PM

DocTee Mar 27 2009 02:20 PM

For a second, i thought that was Frank Viola.

metirish Apr 02 2009 05:20 PM

This is starting to get annoying on FB.

A Boy Named Seo Apr 02 2009 05:48 PM

Was thinking the same shit just today.

metirish Apr 02 2009 06:03 PM

Dumped

A Boy Named Seo Apr 02 2009 07:10 PM

I cut 'em, too.

[Guest cooby]

You should have included ALex Trevino, he looked really cute with a mustache.

[Guest Edgy DC]

Well, join in and post the man.



I'd say he's a solid eight, pushing nine. The full Tony Orlando happening there.

[Guest cooby]

Wasn't he a cutie?

[dgwphotography]

="LeiterWagnerFasterStrongr"] IN RETROSPECT: Less "Magnum," more "Magnum TA." (Or Arn Anderson, if you prefer.)

Actually, I think Gardenhire = Thunderlips - Steroids

[stevejrogers]

How about ranking Mets who once rocked 'staches for a brief period:

Ron Hodges



Ed Kranepool



Bud Harrelson
Eh, not going to find it right now, but Edgy, put up that pic of Buddy with a cute puppy in his glove

[Guest Edgy DC]

Short time moustaches are welcome to be ranked. Several of those already noted were short-timers.

What isn't rankable are Metstaches that are part of full-on beards.

Buddy, is a solid two, but Fido gets a six:



Most short-timers have the ranking disadvantage of the Metstache look as being so jarringly removed from the face we're used to, that it's hard for the player to get buy-in from the rankers.

For instance, is anything not wrong with this photo?

[seawolf17]

I want.

http://www.planetofthegeeks.com/?p=134

[MFS62]

Gardenhire's 'stache wasn't that bad. Maybe because the color was lighter than the others.

Later

[metirish]

[DocTee]

For a second, i thought that was Frank Viola.

[metirish]

This is starting to get annoying on FB.

[A Boy Named Seo]

Was thinking the same shit just today.

[metirish]

Dumped

[A Boy Named Seo]

I cut 'em, too.