Brevity is the Soul of Wit: One Sentence SNY Commercial Summaries, 2021

[G-Fafif]

Ordering office furniture is the true hellish onus of the workday.

[MFS62]

McKayla Maroney can retrieve my frisbee any time she wants.



Later

[Fman99]

Switch to Allstate for the very realistic allure of a non-stop performance of Hugh Masekela's "Grazing in the Grass."

[Fman99]

According to NYC public educators, the Covid vaccine is safe and prevents death (in other news, the sun is big and hot).

[Johnny Lunchbucket]

Sitting on a bench and making bad decisions requires the proper degree of alkalinity in your expensive and wasteful single-serve water, soon-to-fired local celebrity says

Edited September 7, 2021 by Guest

[Johnny Lunchbucket]

Smarmy fuckface encourages foolish sports fans to take pride in the efficiency with which they indebt themselves.

[kcmets]

=G-Fafif post_id=72183 time=1626894225 user_id=55]Douchebags golf. One of them has a phone.

[Frayed Knot]

A bit off from the original intent of this thread, but



a) who convinced Liev Schreiber that shilling for some cut-rate mattress seller was a good idea?



can SUBWAY really gain enough new business to justify what they must be paying Steph Curry, Tom Brady, and Serena Williams to show up in their ads?

[MFS62]

Frayed Knot wrote: can SUBWAY really gain enough new business to justify what they must be paying Steph Curry, Tom Brady, and Serena Williams to show up in their ads?

Well, when you consider that making 5,000 of their "new" tuna sandwiches uses up one whole can of low grade tuna, it could be possible.



Later

[Fman99]

I sure could go for 1/5000th of a can of tuna right now

[Fman99]

It's not a taco, or a sandwich, but, rather, just a disgusting assembly of non-wholesome non-ingredients masquerading as food.

[Fman99]

Fuck TikTok and fuck Applebee's and any other company that tries to make a commercial that is just essentially a stupid ass TikTok video.

[Fman99]

Four assholes test the durability of their yuppie paint in their smug urban dwelling.

[whippoorwill]

Do you guys remember an old ad with some Jonathan Winters type guy smoking a cigar and saying over and over ‘we're gonna get you'?

[Frayed Knot]

White Owl cigars (they sponsored Yanqui games for a time) used the 'We're Gonna Get You' slogan. Perhaps not an appropriate slogan for a health-

compromising and addictive product but, hey, it was the sixties. Breakfast cereals back then would boast about how much sugar they added.

Don't specifically remember Jonathan Winters but it's possible.

[Frayed Knot]

NOT Jonathan Winters ... although I bet this is what you were thinking about





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[whippoorwill]

LOL, that's it. Dad hated these ads!

[Frayed Knot]

Guy & girl meet on beach, start to get all hot and heavy... but then she decides she'd rather munch on a taco.

[Lefty Specialist]

Frayed Knot wrote: Guy & girl meet on beach, start to get all hot and heavy... but then she decides she'd rather munch on a taco.

Boy, the places I could go with that.

[Frayed Knot]

Hey, I'm just here to play straight-man.

[Frayed Knot]

Apparently if you hang out on the right beach, you'll get free beers delivered right to your blanket by Snoop Dogg.