Lefty Specialist

My wife wants to know why I've been giggling like a schoolgirl for the last ten minutes.

Wheeler coming up tomorrow or in two months isn't going to change the trajectory of this season. Having an extra year before he hits free agency is much more valuable than a couple of weeks in 2013.

Damn, why can't Sandy do trades like that? Say, Mike Trout for Nieuwenhuis, Baxter and a couple of Brooklyn pitchers....

That blonde behind him swishes her hair back the same way every time. I guess it's just what she does when Miggy hits a homer.

That's just awesome. Miguel Cabrera = Beast.

Can it just rain until Wheeler's ready?

Duda's a better answer than the other options. First, he's done it in the past, and while he's no Keith Hernandez, he wasn't as bad as many feared. We already know he's an awkward, lumbering outfielder, and that's not going to change no matter how long he's out there. This opens up a spot in the outfield, and frankly anybody you plug in there will give you better production in the lineup than Davis. Baxter. Valdespin. Niewenhuis. A 53-year old Kevin McReynolds. Frankly, I no longer trust Ike. He got a pass last year due to injury and illness, but neither of those is a factor this year. I think he needs a wake-up call, and the only way that can effectively be delivered is with a trip to Las Vegas. If it doesn't work, then you move on.

Well, he'll have to change planes in Charlotte, but they'd better hurry- there's only 1 seat left at this price. $424 US Airways LGA 2:40p LAS 7:40p 8h 00m 1 stop (CLT) Only 1 seat left at this price Depart Fri, May 24 LGA to LAS � 1 stop 8h 00m US Airways � Flight 1505 2h 02m Take-off Fri 2:40p LGA New York, NY Landing Fri 4:42p CLT Charlotte, NC Coach | Fare code: VXA0NJ2P | Airbus A321-100/200 (Narrow-body Jet) | 2h 02m | 94% on time | 543 miles | WiFi Available | 1 seats remain Change planes CLT Charlotte, NC 1h 26m US Airways � Flight 381 4h 32m Take-off Fri 6:08p CLT Charlotte, NC Landing Fri 7:40p LAS Las Vegas, NV Coach | Fare code: VXA0NJ2P | Airbus A321-100/200 (Narrow-body Jet) | 4h 32m | 68% on time | 1910 miles | WiFi Available | 1 seats remain

If they're smart, they'll be hosing down Citi Field to get rid of the smell of rotting ballclub.

Dillon Gee would be awesome if games were four innings long.

What they really need is Murphy leading off an inning with runners on base. Then they'd be all set.

Shaun of the Dead.

I don't think the effect of Jeff Wilpon on history has been fully explored yet. Each one of these is like a little ray of sunshine poking through the relentless gloom that is 2013 Mets baseball. So yeah, keep going with the Jeffies.

Kiss of Death.

I'd take a flyer on Jurrjens. Can't be any worse than what they're throwing out there now.

I wonder if Kevin can help the Pirates with that erection they've had for four hours.

Boy, that fastball was Right. Down. Broadway.

Reyes woulda got him.

It IS hypnotic. The menace on Buck's face makes me glad I'll never be in a position to piss him off.

I heard he bit the usherette's leg in the dark.

"If (Insert name here), (Insert name here),(Insert name here),(Insert name here),and (Insert name here), have a good year, they might be decent."

Wow, I didn't realize it was that long ago. Wally must be awfully itchy. It's like he was the Moonlight Graham of major league managers.

Edgy MD wrote: metirish wrote: But would Wally make the Baxter's, the Recker's better players? I don't know. But I have little doubt that some managers get more from some players than others do. I'm guessing Wally would tell them to send the Baxters and Reckers to Las Vegas. I don't see the value of firing Terry and bringing in Wally right now. We all knew from the git-go that this team was going to suck this year- there were just too many holes. No outfield. 40% of a starting pitching staff. Relievers born during the Nixon Administration. Two closers, one who can't pitch, and um, one who can't pitch. Suspect defense. These are not the building blocks of a successful year. The past few years, this team has had similar sorts of holes and they've been able to kind of keep it together until the All-Star break, when someone sneezes and the house of cards collapses. It's just happening earlier this year. In a way, that's good; it's three fewer months when Jeff Wilpon can delude himself that he can win without spending any money. Wally, bless his little fireplug of a soul, wouldn't make enough of a difference to matter. He can't play the outfield or pitch seven solid innings (and even if he could, the bullpen would blow it). It's better for all concerned to let the detritus sort itself out, for the bottom to be scraped, for warm July nights of under 10,000 at the ballpark to be displayed for the Wilpons to see. If I'm Backman, I don't want to walk into that situation. I'd rather walk in with a fresh start in 2014 and hopefully a little more money to be spent on players, some of which he's helped mold, and some of which he has input on selecting. Now, if it's offered, Backman will take the job. He's consumed with managing in the majors after the D-Backs snatched it away from him a few years ago. He might make a small difference, but not enough to remotely turn this team around this year.

I turned it off after nine. I've seen this movie before, and it always ends unspeakably. Surprised only in that it took another six innings which must have been like watching a Shakespearean death scene.