Bartolo Colon is so fat...

[MFS62]

His clothing has two logos, Goodyear and Met Life.

Later

[Fman99]

He has a mezzanine and a loge.

[Fman99]

Contrary to most people's belief that he was caught being on "the juice," when in fact he was on "au jus."

[Guest Carnac the Metnificent]

A: Page Two















Q: What does Bartolo Colon order from the menu at Denny's?

[Guest Carnac the Metnificent]

A: Homer Simpson
















Q: Who did Bartolo Colon hire as his personal trainer and dietician?

[Ceetar]

His contract was originally for 2/$22 but they deducted the cost of the signing dinner.

[Farmer Ted]

Bartolo is so fat...when he sits around the house, he sits AROUND the house.

[Guest themetfairy]

I initially posted this in the wrong Bartolo Colon thread. What do we have, six of them?

[youtube:233reefd]t2mU6USTBRE[/youtube:233reefd]

[Frayed Knot]

When he pitches in domes, Bartolo says to his fellow players: 'Is it claustrophobic in here or is it just me?'

[Lefty Specialist]

He doesn't pitch from a mound, he pitches from an impact crater.

[ashie62]

He is on a see food diet

[A Boy Named Seo]

Bartolo Colon's physical was conducted at Tuft's Animal Obesity Clinic.

[A Boy Named Seo]

At his most recent random drug testing, Bartolo Colon tested positive for diabetes.

[A Boy Named Seo]

Bartolo Colon swallows whole the myth that pinstripes 'are slimming'.

[A Boy Named Seo]

The Mets have outsourced construction of Bartolo Colon's jerseys to the Ringling Brothers.

[A Boy Named Seo]

"He could stand to lose a few pounds." -Gilbert Grape's mom

[Frayed Knot]

Bartolo Colon is sooooo fat (and old) ... that the Mets only signed him to a two-year contract.

[MFS62]

A Boy Named Seo wrote: At his most recent random drug testing, Bartolo Colon tested positive for diabetes.

What was the reaction when you told that as a joke to a Diabetic?

Later

[A Boy Named Seo]

C'mon, man. Lighten up a little.

[MFS62]

A Boy Named Seo wrote: C'mon, man. Lighten up a little.

That will be next Monday, when I go to the Doctor. He'll be making me lighter when he withdraws three vials of blood to test my blood sugar, like he has been doing every three months for over 20 years.
And I laugh every time I have to check the label on something I buy to see how much sugar it contains.
Yeah.
Funny.

Later

[A Boy Named Seo]

Clearly not trying to disparage diabetics here, sorry if you don't see that. Good luck with your tests, man. Peace.

[MFS62]

OK.
Thanks.
Later