Green Lantern (2011)

[Guest The Second Spitter]

Well, the trailer's out, but I can't tell whether it's gonna be an goofball superhero flick or a grandiose space opera, because, apparently, you can reach both conclusions by it. The director has called it the latter and has compared it to Star Wars, although not specifying which trilogy.

The story's indeed written as a trilogy, probably cataloguing Hal Jordan's ascendancy and then demise and redemption, which will mean nothing to anybody who hasn't read GL or DC books.

Ryan Reynolds (of Wolverine Origins fame) looks and behaves more like Kyle Rayner than Hal Jordan. There's a proliferation of GL universe references in the trailer so the intention is to stay loyal to the books, and most GL fans probably had a nerdgasm watching it. But in the era where movie-goers demand realism in superhero flicks, how do you make a story as far-out as GL realistic?

(I eagerly await Bucket to call me a "geek"!)

[Guest LeiterWagnerFasterStrongr]

That'll be rough-- some of the most compelling stuff in the GL books is inextricably bound up in backstory. Like, say, Sinestro's "turn." Or GL's eventual "turn." Or the Green Arrow stuff in the '70s. Or-- much later-- Parallax or "Blackest Night."

Unlike, say, Batman-- who's had some really cinema-adaptable stories told, and works in two-hour chunks, when they're skillfully told-- it's tough to picture anything but an origin story for GL in feature format.

[Guest The Second Spitter]

Is it my imagination, or does this suddenly look like shit?

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[Benjamin Grimm]

I've always been much more of a Marvel guy than a DC guy, but I've always had a bit of affection for Green Lantern. I'm glad they included the iconic scene of Hal finding the wrecked spaceship. (If only the Hulk movie had had Rick Jones playing a harmonica in his car out in the desert...)

I'll probably see Green Lantern, and I may even like it. But if I saw that clip, and didn't know the characters, I doubt that I'd be interested in seeing the movie. It looks like a lot of costumes and makeup, and a bloated confusing story. But that's typically the kind of stuff that gets included in trailers, so it's hard to judge.

Right now, it's Thor that I'm looking forward to.

[Guest The Second Spitter]

My sister recently attended a private screening of Thor. She said it was:

[Edgy MD]

Add "Attending a private screening of Thor" to euphemisms for sex.

[Vic Sage]

Is it my imagination, or does this suddenly look like shit?

yes, it's your imagination. I just watched that trailer and got goosey bumps all over my body!

[Edgy MD]

I thought it looked far less stupid than the last trailer, and I'm thinking maybe they got feedback on the tone of that one and it informed how they should go forward.

[Guest cooby]

I

[Edgy MD]

I, as well.

[Guest cooby]

hahah. I saw Green HORNET last night, and commented that it was good but really loud. Then I watched the trailer for Green Lantern here and thought oops!

Couldn't delete though

[Edgy MD]

Spitter, would you like to poll-arize this thread?

[Vic Sage]

disappointing, but not terrible -- as usual, too much time worrying about stunts/effects, too little about narrative.

[Edgy MD]

Way too little.

They also put a lot of thought into slinky dresses, says Ms. Edgy.

Comparable to Flash Gordon, I thought, without the self-awareness. So it wasn't camp and it wasn't quite earnest, and in between is a difficult place to land.

[Willets Point]

Didn't this move come out months ago?

[Benjamin Grimm]

Opened this past Friday.

I think I'm gonna wait until it's on cable; it doesn't look like it's worth the price of the movie tickets. I'm willing to overlook that for a Marvel movie, but not so much for a DC movie.

[Edgy MD]

There's a 3-D version in the theaters, if that means anything to you.

[Willets Point]

I could've sworn it came out last winter. Of course, the way they're doing reboots these day maybe this is the remake.

[Vic Sage]

maybe you're thinking of GREEN HORNET?

[Guest LeiterWagnerFasterStrongr]

Benjamin Grimm wrote: Opened this past Friday. I think I'm gonna wait until it's on cable; it doesn't look like it's worth the price of the movie tickets. I'm willing to overlook that for a Marvel movie, but not so much for a DC movie.

It's all those friggin' universes, isn't it?

[Edgy MD]

It opens sort of like Lord of the Rings, in that you need so much backstory to catch up with the layout that they bring you up to speed with a ton of narration accompanying shortcuts of the Lanternian history. (The narrator actually sounded like Alec Guinness.) Once I got that in my head, I started realizing that it had a lot of the same themes --- a ring of power coming to an unlikely holder, opening up the entire universe to a sheltered isolated people, but with him left to wonder why, in such a vast universe, the responsilbiitly has been left to him. Meanwhile, an unspeakable but relatively formless foe that had been defeated but not destroyed ages before has been inexplicably left unguarded and is gaining power. You get douchebags in the hero's company, and the allure and power of the dark-side-turning mentors.

And I didn't like it and don't see people watching this five years from now.

The big problem with all stories in the DC universe exists here: if a big evil spidercloud guy the size of Canarsie (sometimes he's the size of a city, sometimes he fits in a room, so I'm compromising) is threatening the Bay Area as his first stop in destroying the planet before going on to conquer any far off races that get in his way, why isn't Superman on the job? Where's the Flash? Hawkman? The Wonder Twins? Why is it left to a rookie? Some of these DC guys are just too omnipotent. In order to make threats big enough to challenge such godlings as these, the whole planet --- the very existence of mankind --- has to be in the balance. In every film! How can mankind survive in such a state perepetual existential crisis? The PTSD plague would turn us into a race of jibbering nincompoops. I really wish these guys would fight purse snatchers or car theives once in a while. Build a movie around them foiling a ring of nursing home executives bilking seniors out of their benefits.

Anyhow, I realize that Iron Man has already established that, in superhero movies, chicks in Boston Proper cocktail dresses can be capriciously promoted to become CEOs of multi-billion dollar defense contractors, but at least Gwyneth Paltrow wasn't 23 or so at the time, like this one seemed to be. Give me an anchor of reality to make the fantasy more believable, you know? I can't focus on the screen with my eyes rolling all over the place, boobies or no.

So, yeah, more of the same with these films. Some good ideas jumbled together on storyboard, but indifferently sewn into a semi-coherent script, apparently springing from the FX and design concepts, rather than vice-versa, culminating an a rather goofy climax*. But there was clobbering, smartassery, and legs, so congratulations, 14-year-old boys, the world is yours and not mine.

* Did you know once you leave the Earth's atmostphere, you pretty much have all you need in outerspace, right there just beyond our communications satellites? You have big meteor fields and worm holes, and the Sun is like, right next door.

[Benjamin Grimm]

Finally saw this the other day. I gave it two stars, and I think I was being generous.

Lots of action and special effects, but what a lifeless movie. Ryan Reynolds was awful. He wasn't playing Hal Jordan, he was playing Will Farrell.

[Guest The Second Spitter]

Benjamin Grimm wrote: Finally saw this the other day. I gave it two stars, and I think I was being generous. Lots of action and special effects, but what a lifeless movie. Ryan Reynolds was awful. He wasn't playing Hal Jordan, he was playing Will Farrell.

This post sums up my entire thoughts on the film.

A colossal disappointment. Martin Campbell is a one-trick pony, but the script was rubbish.

[Guest LeiterWagnerFasterStrongr]

That reminds me-- I finally saw this during a Free-HBO-and-Cinemax weekend a few weeks ago. Like I said, I almost forgot I saw it. Or, rather, that I sat on the couch for its run, and dozed twice during, at 9 pm or so, on an emptyish stomach.

I don't know about worst comic-book movie I've seen, but it may be the least-rewatchable one I've ever seen.

[Edgy MD]

I always wonder what it does to a marriage between two actors when the crappy film they meet on becomes an embarrassing bomb that negatively affects their careers. Does it somehow doom the marriage (more than it already is, as a marriage between actors) to be associated with such a dog? Is their meetup story too embarrassing to speak of?



They'd love to go on with the marriage and forget the film, but every article about them includes the phrase, "The couple, who met on the set of...." and so their relationship becomes for people a constant distasteful reminder of a movie they're desperately trying to put behind them.

[nymr83]

run of the mill superhero movie that i finally saw.

i grew up on Marvel, so i didnt know or care about any messed up history here (that i'm sure pissed DC fans off), i thought it was mediocre, the entire plot was too obvious even down to "gee i bet the other lanterns are about to show up and rescue Hal from falling into the sun with green chains"... and they did. with green chains.

this would have actually been better if they had accepted that the story wasnt good and did MORE special effects, because the limitless things he could do with the ring were cool and could have been funnier (the AA gun made me giggle)