KTE: Dodgers v. Mets, Apr 27-29

[A Boy Named Seo]

After losing 4 of 6 to the Reds and the Nats, the defending NL West champs limp into Citi tonight to start a 3-game set tonight with your surging, white-hot New York Metropolitans. It's a fine time to catch the current Dodgers, ladies and gentleman, because they're a team with a couple of notable injuries and subsequently their roster has more holes than Fman's pre-pubescent mattress. No, enough lame Fman/sex jokes already. More holes than a Tiger Woods... no, not relevant or topical. More holes than Mike Jacobs' swing? That's OK. Maybe shoulda said Catalanotto. Holes anyway. There are holes.

The Pitchers

Tonight, 7:10PM

Hiroki Kuroda (2-0, 2.18)
v.

Ollie Pee (0-2, 3.71)

Nice numbers for Kuroda, but he comes in after his worst start in Cincy, giving up 3 earned in 5.2 IP. He isn't walking dudes at all (3 in 20.2) innings, but he's given up his share of hits (22), so we can get to him.

Ollie's gonna face a pretty right-handedy lineup and one that's done OK against him, sez MLB.com:

Perez has a 2.84 ERA in 25 1/3 innings in those starts. His success may be in some jeopardy Monday. Russell Martin, Matt Kemp, Garrett Anderson and Jamey Carroll have batted .486 in 35 composite at-bats against him.

I ain't skeered.

Tuesday, 7:10PM

Charlie Haeger (0-2, 6.46)
v.

Johan (2-1, 2.59)

Haeger's a knuckleballer all-the-way, including wearing the knuckleballers' #49. Another thing to know about him is that he's not great at preventing baseball hitters from scoring upon him with his pitched balls. In fairness, he K's his share of dudes, but walks waaaay too many (12 BB, 19 K in 15.1 IP) and he's gotten his ass kicked because of it. A little patience Tuesday could go a long, long way.

Wednesday, Gay Dame, 1:10PM

TBA
v.

John Maine (0-1, 8.64)

Vicente Padilla just went on the DL over the weekend, so the Dodgers are shuffling their rotation around a bit, it looks like bumping Haeger up one day into vacated Padilla's spot. If they DON'T do that, LA might call someone up from AAA Albuquerque to go Tuesday, and bump Haeger to Wednesday. Either way, could be a good opportunity to score some runs and get Maine a much-needed "W".

If we get to the bullpen, well that's good news, too. Their relievers have been very hittable until you get to Broxton at the end (7 IP, 0 ER, 1 BB, 11 K). Dodgers bully ERA is 13th in the league at 5.14 and they've walked 37 hitters in 64 innings. Also nice that we're avoiding their ace Kershaw and Chad Billingsley, too, who had a good start last time out against the Nats.

The Batters

Manny, as we know, is on the DL and will miss the circus and the series. Ex-Angel Garrett Anderson or Reed Johnson will get the starts in his place and that should also be good news for us. Here's how the Dodgers should line up:

SS - Rafael Furcal .312/.384/.429
C- Russell Martin .304/.403/.393
RF - Andre Ethier .356/.424/.627
CF - Matt Kemp .316/.379/.645
1B - James Loney .325/.341/.400
3B - Casey Blake .328/.379/.607
LF - Garrett Anderson .143/.184/.257 or Reed Johnson .276/.276/.379
2B - Blake DeWitt .261/.404/.283

Pretty good lineup. Lots of .300's in there (Dodgers lead the NL with a .293 BA) and are second behind the Phils in runs scored (103) and third in OPS (.815). Kemp and Ethier are complete studs and Rafael Furcal seems healthy for the moment and is subsequently not sucking. Casey Blake (ex-Indian) is raking. Work cut out for us.

Ex-Factor

Them: Only Torre, I think.

Us: Cora, Tatis

The Dodgers put up 30 runs in Cincy (and still lost 2 of 3) and then scored only 5 runs in 3 games against the Nats, getting shutout for 7 by Scott F. Olsen yesterday. Great offense for sure, but they're not in good form right and we are, so let's keep this shit rolling, I say.

LGM

[ashie62]

Super! Ollie Pee is too funny.

I see Kemp & Either as breakout bigass impact players. The good news is Loney has not really developed power and hits behind these two.

[Guest Edgy DC]

Jonathan Broxton:

[ashie62]

Jonathan is a fat pussy toad and somehow related to the MFY named Joba

[Fman99]

Broxton is rotund in the caboosal region. I think your closer should have a little extra meat in his seat, it's a good look in those baggy baseball pants and all.

LGM indeed.

[Guest LeiterWagnerFasterStrongr]

Just like Broxton's sani-pants, the KTE rides nice and tight, Seo.

This Doyer lineup gives me nervous belly.

[HahnSolo]

Russell Martin Garrett Anderson Reed Johnson Casey Blake Blake Dewitt

LA leads the league in "guys whose first name can easily serve as a last name".

[metirish]

Nice work Seo , extra points for not working Torre in to the KTE.

[Gwreck]

This might get overlooked as neither one pitches this series but Jon Niese and Chad Billingsley were high school teammates.

[Guest LeiterWagnerFasterStrongr]

Also overlooked: their best starter going this go-round-- Mr. Kuroda-- has Brad Pennyesque career (such as it is) numbers against the Flushing Nine.

3 GS
10 IP (tops in one start: 4 IP @ home last year)
10.45 ERA
2.90 WHIP
23 H allowed
3 HR allowed
7 BB
2 K

No other major-league team-- including one-off starts like the Rangers or Red Sox-- has hit him better. (Wright and Reyes have, in miniscule sample sizes, beaten him especially savagely, as have-- alas-- Murph and Beltran.)

Edited April 26, 2010 by Guest

[MFS62]

From his Braves days, and the early "who's best" (vs Jose Reyes) arguements with Braves fans, I still call him Rafael Fecal.

Later

[Gwreck]

I never get tired of mentioning Rafael Furcal's first DWI arrest and how as a result, he was forced to acknowledge that he was really 22 and not 19.

(Edit: I had forgotten that he had a second DWI arrest, while on probation for the first one. Douchebag.)

[Guest themetfairy]

Nice knowledge Seo!

[soupcan]

Anbybody know what happened to the Dodger Blues forum? It looks like its been abandoned and completely taken over by porn and viagra spammers.

[TransMonk]

Yeah, that was a great place...my favorite enemy site. Looks like it's all but gone as the main page only gets updated about once a week.

The forum is a mess.

[Guest Edgy DC]

Porn and viagra spammers are to websites as worms and decay are to us. Someday nothing will be left of the CPF but the porn and viagra spammers eating the lifeless husk from the inside out.