For the third straight month, the Mets visit the Washington Nationals. Well planned MLB! The Nationals are the #1 team in baseball, per smart guy Jonah Keri (the Mets are number 19). The Mets are 3 and 9 against the Nationals this season, including 0 and 4 with me in attendance. The standings: The Nationals are 73-45, the best record in baseball, and in 1st place in the NL East by 4 games ahead of the Braves. The Nationals host the Braves on Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday so perhaps they�ll be looking ahead to that series. The Mets are 56-62, 3d place but only 3.5 games away from last place. The Nationals have the 2d best run differential in baseball. They do everything well, with the only possible question being in the bullpen as Drew Storen regains his strength following elbow surgery. The current closer is Tyler Clippard who has 25 saves. Davey Johnson keeps three left-handers in his bullpen (Sean Burnett, Tom Gorzellany, and Mike Gonzalez) so expect a lot of pitching changes. The managers: The selection for the all-time best Mets manager, Davey Johnson, is the manager of the Nationals. The Mets manager is Terry Collins. Areyoufriggingkiddingme? The opposing lineup: I could cut and paste the names and numbers, but they are right here. Bryce Harper is something to behold. Sure he�s a punk but I wish he was our punk. His swing is an act of violence. Still, he�s been slumping of late. You know the locals love him because they are making excuses for him. He�s not arrogant, he has �self-assurance� and �unassailable confidence�. The matchups, with a nod to the classic Elias Baseball Analyst: August 17 (7:05): Johan Santana, LHP, 6-8, 4.58, 1.33 WHIP Loves to face: Michael Morse, 0 for 8 Hates to face: Jason Werth, 8 for 20, 1 HR v. Ross Detweiler, LHP, 6-5, 3.18, 1.16 Loves to face: Jason Bay, 1 for 9 Hates to face: David Wright, 5 for 12, 1 HR, 4 RBI Weather permitting, I will be in Section 115, Row V and it�s my last chance to see the Mets win in DC this season. It�s also �Retro Cap Night.�. August 18 (7:05): Jonathon Niese, LHP, 9-6, 3.67, 1.18 Loves to face: Ian Desmond, 2 for 11; Jayson Werth 8 K�s Hates to face: Ryan Zimmerman, 4 for 11; Adam LaRoche, 2 HR v. Edwin Jackson, RHP, 7-7 3.74, 1.21 Loves to face: Scott Hairston, 0 for 7 Hates to face: Jason Bay, 3 for 11, 1 HR Third Eye Blind will be performing after the game. August 19 (1:35): Jeremy Hefner, RHP, 2-4, 4.76, 1.38 Loves to face: Ian Desmond, 0 for 3; Jesus Flores, 0 for 3 Hates to face: Michael Morse, 3 for 6, 1 HR; Adam LaRoche, 3 for 6, 1 HR; Danny Espinosa, 3 for 6, 1 HR v. Gio Gonzalez, LHP, 15-6, 3.29, 1.14 Loves to face: Jason Bay, 0 for 8 Hates to face: Ike Davis, 3 for 5, 1 HR Once again, the Mets miss Stephen Strasburg. He only has two starts this season against the Mets in five possible series. You will still probably hear several discussions between Gary and Keith or Ron about the innings limit that will shortly end Strasburg�s season. The locals: I�ve been told that I repeat myself in these KTE�s and I will do so again. Sports here (DC) is not like sports there (NY) as almost all of the locals root for the same team. There are plenty of transplants that retain their allegiances but a vast majority of the people in Washington, DC and the DC suburbs of Maryland and Virginia root for the Redskins, Nationals, Capitals, and Wizards. Oh, how insufferable Redskins fans are; loud, rude, arrogant, and that�s only for starters. I was at their crappy stadium last season when Sanchez hit Holmes for the go-ahead TD and it was one of the best sports moments I�ve had in a long time. After another terrible season (but great to me), the locals have bounced back as the Redskins did what they do best: win the pre-season. The fans have �RGIII� fever and their expectations are sky-high, as usual. There�s no middle-ground with them, no incremental progress. I look forward to their being disappointed once again. Schadenfreude, bitches! Nationals fans don�t deserve the joy of a pennant. That doesn�t mean they don't deserve happiness as at least two or three of them might otherwise be good people, but baseball happiness, no. They haven�t suffered. They don�t know what it�s like to collapse at the end of a regular season or lose in the playoffs. As a result, I don�t believe that they can appreciate winning a pennant. The Nationals have been no better than .500 since their arrival in 2005 so for their fans, it�s �my team sucked and now we�re great.� It shouldn�t be that easy. Winning now would be unfair to those of us that have felt so much pain. As a result, I have to confess that I have been rooting for the Atlanta Braves (other than when they play the Mets, of course). Not because they are the Braves but because they are not the Nationals and have the best chance to overtake the Nationals. I know that we hate the Braves (and wish nothing but the best for Davey Johnson) but I don�t live in Atlanta. I don�t have friends that are Nationals fans. I don�t work with Braves fans. Besides, it would be better for them. After some heartbreak, winning in a subsequent year would taste sweeter. I�m really doing them a favor. Victory Song: �Raise Your Glass� by Pink. After hearing it so often while departing Nationals Park, it�s achieved �The Pina Colada Song� status for me so whenever it comes on the radio, I slam the button. Let�s hope we don�t hear it this weekend. Thomas Boswell: The once great but now awful columnist must have oozed Nat juice all over himself writing his latest piece of dreck. Just about anything he's written about the Nationals over the past year is similar. The Nationals TV announcers: suck