The Benson Bunch Lives

[metirish]

]Whoa, that's kinda weird. Is it just me or does she kinda look like Derek Lowe in drag?

LOL..that is so freaking funny.....and now that you mention it she does..

[Willets Point]

Derek Lowe in Drag would be a good handle. I'll have to keep it in mind if I ever tire of Willets Point.

By the way, I'm surprised that Lowe didn't ask Benson for a beer immediately on his arrival to the meeting.

[Guest Edgy DC]

Update me!

[seawolf17]

No need for an update. She still looks like Derek Lowe in drag.

[Guest Johnny Dickshot]

In ERA order:


Lowe
10-13, 3.67
--Dominated San Diego in his last outing to follow up a 1-hitter vs. the Cubs 2 weeks ago. Lowe has allowed only three runs in 31 2/3 innings over his last four starts, which some attributed to a change of positioning on the rubber but which Lowe attributes to wild sex with married reporters. No, actually: “I’m probably pitching more instead of being one-dimensional -- you know, sinker, sinker, sinker.”


Benson
9-7, 4.00
--Lost four straight since beating Pittsburgh Aug. 16 in part by singling home two runs. Benson and his hot wife recently donated a sack of cash to care for kids who lost a parent in 9/11 and vowed to stay involved. "We aren't the type of people that give money and disappear. "We're the type of people that go out and continue to support what we do."


Clement
13-4, 4.17
--Goes for win #14 tonight against the Jays. He stumbled after the ASB with several bad outings, but has righted the ship since a loss the to MFYs.


Leiber
14-12, 4.42
--Leading the Philly playoff push. In last 8 outings he’s had seven quality starts, five wins, two losses and after Sunday’s win over Florida, three straight 1-ER outings. While manager Charlie Manuel credited his overcoming some early-season fatigue, Leiber raised his glass to his drinkin’ buddy. “Give [catcher] Todd [Pratt] a lot of credit back there. He did a great job moving around and setting up my pitches.”



Perez
7-7, 4.73
--Out since Aug. 18 with an oblique strain, the flaky lefty recently informed reporters that manager Jim Tracy’s plan to use him out of the bullpen is Not. Cool. “If I'm ready to pitch, then I want to pitch and start," he sniffed. “Nobody has said anything to me. Ask me and then make the decision."


Pavano
4-6, 4.77
--Said last week his season is over, due to shoulder tendonitis.



Wright
4-2, 5.76
--Starting tonight vs. the Devil Dogs after trying to catch a line drive with his neck against Oakland in his last start forced his removal. 4 ER, ND vs. the Dogs in his last start.


Milton
7-14, 6.63
--Goes tonight vs. the Cubs. Failed to get out of the 4th inning in each of his last two starts.



Ortiz
5-10, 6.88
--KOed last night when the Rockies scored six runs in the fourth. “He just lost it in a hurry," manager Bob Melvin observed. We observe him surpassing Milton in the BB Hall of Shame

[Elster88]

THE METS SHOULD NEVER HAVE MADE THE BENSON TRADE!! THERE WERE FIVE OTHER GUYS WHO WERE JUST AS GOOD WHO WE COULD'VE SIGNED IN THE OFFSEASON FOR THE SAME MONEY!!!

AND THEN WE WOULD'NT HAVE HAD TO GIVE UP TY WIGGINTON, WHO WAS SO GOOD HE ONLY SPENT PART OF THIS YEAR IN THE PIRATES' FARM SYSTEM!! HE ACTUALLY SPENT THE MAJORITY OF THE SEASON STARTING FOR THAT JUGGERNAUT OF A CLUB!!!
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This post had the designation 157) Alex Ochoa

[smg58]

The Mets will likely miss Huber, but the Pirates have basically nothing to show for that deal.

[Guest Johnny Dickshot]

I have a lot of work to do today. If someone would like to prepare a year-end BB ranking and maybe a short play, here's the source material.

[MFS62]

seawolf17 wrote: No need for an update. She still looks like Derek Lowe in drag.

A little off topic, but have you ever seen pictures of Joe Torre's sister the Sister? She looks like Joe in a Habit.

Later

[Guest Johnny Dickshot]

My first attempt at a chart:

The Benson Bunch 2005 Final Standings	W	L	IP	ERA	WHiP	VORP	BAA	Contract	Comments
Clement	13	6	191.0	4.57	1.36	21.7	.260	3/$25.5	Never the same after line-drive-to-forehead incident, 7/26. Killed in the playoffs.
Lowe	12	15	222.0	3.61	1.25	25.3	.260	4/$36	If he could cut down on HRs allowed (28) would be great
Benson	10	8	174.1	4.13	1.26	22.6	.253	3/$22.5	Ugly second half. Hurt again?
Perez	7	8	108.2	4.56	1.26	8.7	.262	3/$24	Injured & cranky all year. Ought to benefit from Tracy's departure.
Pavano	4	6	100.0	4.77	1.47	-1.3	.315	4/$40	Bust.
Leiber	17	13	218.1	4.20	1.21	29.0	.263	3/$21	Bad luck, struggles early prevented 20 wins.
Ortiz	5	11	115.0	6.89	1.84	-20.4	.313	4/$30	Awful year in every respect.
Milton	8	15	186.1	6.47	1.55	-24.9	.302	3/$25.5	Major-league leading 40 HRs allowed & .892 opponent OPS.
Wright	5	5	63.2	6.08	1.77	-9.8	.313	3/$21	Disaster.

[Valadius]

It's so far down...