The Philly Press is taking swipes at the Phillies players already. Tongue-in-cheek, perhaps. But probably not warranted this early in the season in the morning rags. Morning Bytes: Phillies need to relax, smile, shave By Frank Fitzpatrick Inquirer Sports Columnist Here are some early-season observations about some Phillies: Jimmy Rollins: If he's hurt, they're dead. Suggestion: Don't come back until the ankle's OK. Shane Victorino: Maybe he ought to change his first name to Chase. He's got six hits and just two walks in 37 at-bats and seems intent on flailing at anything in the ballpark's zip code. Suggestion: Bunts, ground balls. Chase Utley: He remains an offensive machine, but now we know why he's named Chase. It's what he does after ground balls bound away. Suggestion: left field when Pat Burrell departs. Ryan Howard: He's lunging overanxiously at the ball again, displaying more impatience than Larry Bowa at the ballet. Suggestion: Relax, you're making $10 million. Pat Burrell: There is nothing to complain about here except his speed, which approximates Jackie Gleason's. Amazingly, this Travis Lee disciple even showed some emotion last week, pumping his fist after a double. Suggestion: Smile. Geoff Jenkins: He seems like a good pickup, though his arm looks weaker than Charlie Manuel's grammar. Suggestion: Shave. Pedro Feliz: Seems like the tools are there, but, frankly, if he doesn't get his act together soon, Philly fans are going to make him feel more like Pedro Triste. Suggestion: Learn to hit a breaking ball. Carlos Ruiz: We like him behind the plate, but he's another guy who needs to mix in an occasional walk. He seems to have warning-track power everywhere but Citizens Bank Park. Suggestion: Shorten the stroke. Eric Bruntlett: He apparently got infield tutoring from Roberto Duran. Suggestion: Play deep. Brett Myers: His woe-is-me body language mirrored his two disappointing starts. Suggestion: Calm down, slow down. Jamie Moyer: With just a little help from umpires, this mound Methuselah can still get hitters out. Suggestion: Try the early-bird special at the Melrose Diner. Kyle Kendrick: I haven't seen this much nibbling since my rabbit died. Suggestion: Don't ask about Marty Bystrom.