Edgy MD

There's little that one might conceive as unknown about the Zim. He's got a metal plate or two in his head. He simultaneously did endorsements for a diet program and a fried chicken chain. He quit the Yankees in a principled protest over their treatment of Joe Torre, but (1) Joe did not, and (2) when he quit, he stayed quit, unlike Yogi. What you don't know: Zim is a sucker for doomsday theories. He has been known to stay up half the night looking for Internet reports of signs in the sky, and has twice given his belongings away to prepare for The End. Rocco Baldelli privately recalled visiting Tampa one offseason and seeing a poorly kempt man on the street with a "Prepare --- The End Is NYE" poster. He said he wouldn't have even looked twice, but the strange spelling intrigued him, and then he suddenly recognized the elderly baseball legend! He wrestled the old Gerbil into a cab (which would have been even harder if he wasn't weakened by his Doomsday Diet), and got him to the ballpark, where he and an assistant trainer who happened to be at Tropicana Field that day started filling the old guy up with chicken and SlimFast until he started to make sense. His family began a gradual intervention, disallowed unsupervised Internet use, and gradually he got his shit back together, and everybody breathed a sigh of relief when Popeye let the reputed date of the Mayan Apocalypse pass without going back off the deep end. Score one for Dr. Phil! Zim's a cat who has always landed on his feet, as he did again this time, with his Doomsday Diet Cookbook currently at #3 on the New York Times Bestseller List. The great Pedro Martinez, we know, recently joined the Red Sox front office. But damned if I know what's happened to the not-so-great Pedro Martinez. Could anybody fill me in?

I was wondering if, after 10 years of Peter Jackson not wanting to direct this film but it ultimately falling to him, I wondered briefly if anybody thought of Terry Gilliam as a candidate. And then I realized Gilliam already made his Hobbit 30+ years ago, but called it Time Bandits. Had Ian Holm and everything.

Mets have a history of righthanded mashing thirdbasemen who nobody gave much of a thought to as an outfielder until they got to the big league level --- Kevin Mitchell, Butch Huskey, and... well that's two. Daniel Murphy if you include slappy lefties as well.

madamimadam wrote: Terry Collins plans to give righty-hitting infielders Justin Turner and Zach Lutz looks in the outfield during spring training, he told ESPNNewYork.com on Thursday. Terry Collins, you're so obviously reading here, and I think it's beautiful.

Brian Costa wrote: MLB spokesman: "Our understanding of the basic agreement is that the Mets would lose the No. 11 draft pick." (if they sign Bourn)

I think the advantage that speed guys may hold is that, as they come into their old guy skills, their legs may deteriorate, but everybody's legs deterioration, but their legs having started at the high end of the curve, won't deteriorate as much so as to take them off the field. Mookie was one guy whose legs were still weaponized in this 30s.

I believe "Shaun" was already on file with "Shaun Fitzmaurice." Chone Figgins, still out there.

It's worth noting that, as imperfect a package as he may be, the team needs defenders.

Couldn't find any thread announcing his signing. I did find... Scott Hairston is on pace for 700 home runs this year.

I imagine the Mets' offer wouldn't amount even to 3x15. More like 3x10, or 3x10 plus option. Or maybe with some creative escalation. It's a little ate in the season for Boras to be shopping for six-year deals, and surely most suitors are similarly approaching with eyes wide open to concerns about getting locked too deeply into Bourn's inconsistency.

In addition to Wheeler, they'll have a handful of guys at AAA --- McHugh, Familia, Wheeler, Mejia, Hefner --- competing for a chance to crack that rotation, most with some MLB experience, most with notable upside. They needed a veteran to help hold the rotation down until one of those guys turned the corner, and Marcum is better than I thought they'd get. Now, if they could get somebody to put Dillon Gee's feet to the fire as well, that'd be nice.

I think you need to relax. Whatever the Mets deserve, you being a douchebag isn't what the rest of us deserve.

Tough blow for Ashely McHugh. Meanwhile, welcome back to Wanda Feliciano.

And one more thread turns in to a Fuck the Mets thread.

Which one is she?

Nice to see some action on shoring up the rotation. Starting Pitchers Outfielders Signed Away From MilwaukeeRemoved From Projected Roster Signed Away By Chicago =#FF8000]18 =#0000FF]Shaun Marcum DoB: 12/14/1981 =#0000FF]36 =#FF8000]Collin McHugh DoB: 6/19/1987 =#0000FF]12 Scott Hairston DoB: 5/25/1980 Your Projected Opening Day 2013 Mets (Orange Indicates Players Have Options) Starting Pitchers =#0000FF]35 =#FF8000]Dillon Gee DoB: 4/28/1986 =#0000FF]33 =#FF8000]Matt Harvey DoB: 3/27/1989 =#FF8000]18 =#0000FF]Shaun Marcum DoB: 12/14/1981 =#0000FF]49 Jonathon Niese DoB: 10/27/1986 =#0000FF]57 Johan Santana DoB: 3/13/1979Relief Pitchers =#FF8000]40 =#0000FF]Greg Burke DoB: 9/21/1982 =#0000FF]73 =#FF8000]Robert Carson DoB: 1/23/1989 =#0000FF]66 =#FF8000]Josh Edgin DoB: 12/17/1986 =#0000FF]48 Frank Francisco DoB: 9/11/1979 =#0000FF]32 =#FF8000]Jenrry Mejia DoB: 10/11/1989Relief Pitchers Catchers Infielders =#0000FF]39 Bobby Parnell DoB: 9/8/1984 =#0000FF]62 Elvin Ramirez DoB: 10/10/1987 =#FF8000]34 =#0000FF]John Buck DoB: 7/7/1980 =#FF8000]20 =#0000FF]Anthony Recker DoB: 2/13/1983 =#0000FF]29 =#FF8000]Ike Davis DoB: 3/22/1987Infielders =#FF8000]18 =#0000FF]Brandon Hicks DoB: 9/14/1985 =#0000FF]28 Daniel Murphy DoB: 4/1/1985 =#0000FF]11 Ruben Tejada DoB: 10/27/1989 =#0000FF]2 Justin Turner DoB: 11/23/1984 =#0000FF]5 David Wright DoB: 12/20/1982Outfielders =#0000FF]23 =#FF8000]Mike Baxter DoB: 12/7/1984 =#FF8000]12 =#FF8000]Collin Cowgil DoB: 5/22/1986 =#0000FF]21 =#FF8000]Lucas Duda DoB: 2/3/1986 =#0000FF]9 =#FF8000]Kirk Nieuwenhuis DoB: 8/7/1987 =#0000FF]1 =#FF8000]Jordany Valdespin DoB: 12/23/1987 Also on 40-Man Roster Starting Pitchers =#0000FF]27 =#FF8000]Jeurys Familia DoB: 10/10/1989 =#FF8000]76 =#FF8000]Gonzalez Germen DoB: 9/23/1987 =#FF8000]20 =#FF8000]Darin Gorski DoB: 10/6/1987 =#0000FF]53 =#FF8000]Jeremy Hefner DoB: 3/11/1981 =#0000FF]36 =#FF8000]Collin McHugh DoB: 6/19/1987Starting Pitchers Catchers Infielders =#FF8000]72 =#FF8000]Hansel Robles DoB: 8/13/1990 =#FF8000]45 =#FF8000]Zack Wheeler DoB: 5/30/1990 =#FF8000]16 =#FF8000]Travis d'Arnaud DoB: 2/10/1989 =#0000FF]71 =#FF8000]Wilmer Flores DoB: 8/6/1991 =#0000FF]74 =#FF8000]Reese Havens DoB: 10/20/1986InfieldersOutfielders =#0000FF]65 =#FF8000]Zach Lutz DoB: 6/3/1986 =#FF8000]79 =#FF8000]Wilfredo Tovar DoB: 8/11/1991 =#0000FF]76 =#FF8000]Juan Lagares DoB: 3/17/1989 =#0000FF]67 =#FF8000]Cesar Puello DoB: 4/1/1991 Also in Camp Starting PitchersRelief Pitchers =#FF8000]32 =#0000FF]Aaron Laffey DoB: 4/15/1985 =#FF8000]44 =#FF8000]Cory Mazzoni DoB: 10/19/1989 =#FF8000]61 =#FF8000]Rafael Montero DoB: 10/17/1990 =#0000FF]40 Tim Byrdak DoB: 10/37/1978 =#FF8000]25 =#0000FF]Pedro Feliciano DoB: 8/25/1976Relief Pitchers Catchers Infielders =#FF8000]67 =#FF8000]Scott Rice DoB: 9/21/1981 =#FF8000]59 =#0000FF]Carlos Torres DoB: 10/22/1982 =#FF8000]63 =#FF8000]Juan Centeno DoB: 11/16/1989 =#FF8000]38 =#0000FF]Landon Powell DoB: 3/19/1982 =#FF8000]10 =#0000FF]Brian Bixler DoB: 10/22/1982Infielders Outfielders =#FF8000]6 =#0000FF]Omar Quintanilla DoB: 10/24/1981 =#FF8000]3 =#FF8000]Josh Rodriguez DoB: 12/18/1984 =#FF8000]3 =#FF8000]Josh Satin DoB: 12/23/1984 =#FF8000]13 =#FF8000]Andrew Brown DoB: 9/10/1984 =#FF8000]22 =#FF8000]Matt den Dekker DoB: 8/10/1987Outfielders =#FF8000]55 =#FF8000]Jamie Hoffman DoB:8/20/1984 Free Agents Starting PitchersRelief PitchersCatchers =#0000FF]55 Chris Young DoB: 5/25/1979 =#0000FF]45 =#FF8000]Justin Hampson DoB: 1/23/1989 =#0000FF]52 Ram�n Ram�rez DoB:8/31/1981 =#0000FF]60 John Rauch DoB:9/27/1978 =#0000FF]6 Kelly Shoppach DoB: 4/29/1984Infielders =#0000FF]13 Ronny Cede�o DoB: 2/2/1983 Coaching Staff ManagerBench CoachBatting CoachPitching CoachThird Base CoachFirst Base Coach =#0000FF]10 Terry Collins DoB: 5/27/1949 =#0000FF]7 Bob Geren DoB: 9/22/1959 =#0000FF]51 Dave Hudgens DoB: 12/5/1956 =#0000FF]59 Dan Warthan DoB: 12/1/1952 =#0000FF]18 Tim Teufel DoB: 7/7/1958 =#0000FF]26 Tom Goodwin DoB: 8/27/1968 Bullpen Coach Bullpen CatcherBatting Practice Pitcher Head Trainer Assistant Trainer Mascot =#0000FF]52 Ricky Bones DoB: 4/7/1969 =#0000FF]79 Dave Racaniello DoB: 10/15/1981 =#0000FF]78 Eric Langill DoB: 4/9/1979 =#BF8080].=#0000FF] Ray Ramirez =#BF8080]. =#BF8080].=#0000FF] Brian Chicklo =#BF8080]. =#BF8080].=#0000FF] Mr. Met =#BF8080].

I'm not sure who the "power hitter for right" is, but if he is a free agent, and generally as good as Bourn, then the issue remains.

John Cougar Lunchbucket wrote: Hmm ... veteran nibbler, ex-Brewer, "knows how to pitch," overcoming arm trouble, wears No. 18 ... Welcome back, Jeff D'Amico! Of course, Jeff D'Amico could eat Shaun Marcum and still have room for dessert. Consistent pitcher.

Hairston had one of the most impressive necks in Met history --- his portrait looked like that of a fullback, without the bad-dude face that fullbacks make in their portraits. A lot of fans were down on him being resigned, it seemed. I thought his 2011 suggested more power in 2012 than was apparent from the stats, because he seemed to have an inordinate share of drives down the line that went just foul. I thought, "Straighten a few of those out, and you're a valuable bench player/platoon guy." Sure enough, he did, and upped his homers from 7 to 20, but a lot of that can also be ascribed to increased opportunity and fall-off in other departments, as his rate stats really only went up a tick in the net --- his OPS climbing from .773 to .803, and his OPS+ going from 113 to 117. But go up it did, and that's a nice trick to pull off when you're 32 and your playing time more than doubles. I've grown increasingly fascinated by baseball clans, especially as baseball appears to slide further back in sports of choice among American kidz, and children of baseball players, raised in opulence, have every reason to grow up without the hunger to make the bigs. The Hairstons may be my favorite, as they go back three generations, come out of the great baseball cradle that was Alabama, have pedigree that stretches to the Negro Leagues and the Mexican League. Jerry, Sr. actually had a baseball wedding in a ballpark, which supposedly has specific protocols written down somewhere, and I'd love to see sometime. The next generation has African, European, and native Mexican blood running through their veins and I hope there's a ballplayer or two among them.

Well, the Braves might object. They probably would not like to see the general agreement re-written to retroactively address a case they have a stake in. If the Mets get Bourn and get their way, I imagine it will be based on a sympathetic reading of the rule as its written, rather than a rewrite. Who gets to make that ruling, whether it's the commissioner or some other person or body, I'm not sure.

When does a set of 10 contain 11? Mets are curious about Michael Bourn. Getting Michael Bourn means a signing team has to forfeit its first-round pick. That is, unless that first-round pick is in the top ten, then the signing team forfeits its second-round pick The Mets pick is in the top ten. But wait, the Pirates, by failing to sign their top ten pick in 2012, are awarded a pick in the same position in 2013. That knocks the Mets #10 pick to #11. But why should that pick be suddenly exposed because the Pirates, through no fault (or grace) of the Mets, got to jump in line? Sounds like a defensible position for the Mets to argue, whether or not it turns out to be a fruitful one.

Go figure. I had Norton pegged for gay. Just goes to show you. You never, never know.

Because that has happened when?

It's hardly necessary to announce that it's your opinion.

Called Buzz Aldrin a liar and a fraud and got his face punched in, did poor misguided Brent Gaff. What was he thinking? Hey, Bartolome Fortunato, surely you did better than Gaff did?