Know Your Reds

[Guest John Cougar Lunchbucket]

LET�S START HERE


PITCHING MATCHUPS
Anyone remember that game where Paul LoDuca had two 3-run homers and 7 RBI? I didn�t either. But that�s what happened the last time we faced Friday�s starter, righty Matt Belisle (1-2, 6.91). He opposes Pelfrey (2-2, 5.27) in a battle of respective No. 5s. At Shea last year, Belisle went 7 IP and gave up only one run and got a ND. Pelfrey faced the Reds once last season in relief, and beat them in his one start in 2006.
This game may be rained out.

Saturday, 1:10 p.m.
RHP Bronson Arroyo (1-4, 8.63) vs. LHP Johan Santana (3-2, 2.91)
Dusty Baker on Arroyo after his last start:
"We're going to get him checked out maybe something is wrong with him. His pitches aren't sharp. His breaking ball isn't crisp. We'll get him examined. You don't want to find anything. But, hopefully, we can up with some kind of solution. I know he's going crazy, too."

Arroyo on Arroyo after his last start:
"There ain't nothing to check out. They said they want to check me out? That's probably the best I felt in years on a day game. I've got no excuses. They just beat my ass. I had a good fastball, decent command, everything felt good."
Arroyo�s last start: 1.1 IP, 7 ER vs. the Braves

Sunday, 1pm.
RHP �Little� Johnny Cueto (2-3, 5.27) vs. LHP �Little� Oliver Perez (2-3, 4.63)

Considered a primo prospect but a longshot to make the team, the 22-year-old Cueto got off to a great start this year, then got shelled a few times, then had pretty good start the other day vs. the Cubs. Little wiry guy with dynamite stuff who resembles his idol, could give us fits.

�Pedro has been my inspiration, the person for whom I decided to stop playing outfield to become a pitcher. One of my biggest dreams is to be able to meet Pedro in person, shake his hand and tell him that he has been my hero and my role model."

***

NOT PITCHING
The Reds best two starters, Aaron Harang and Edinson Volquez (ERA+ 414).

***
THE REGULAR LINEUP
Corey Patterson, CF: I think of him as a Met-killer, but he�s barely hanging on

Jeff Keppinger, SS: X-Met Red-Ass, never whiffs or walks.

Ken Griffey, RF: Last year in Cincy unless they go crazy and exercise a $16 MM option. Many believe they will trade him after he hits his 600th HR, but his slow start has people wondering how long that will take (he has 597).

Brandon Phillips, 2B: Pretty good player

Joey Votto, 1B: Young Canadian slugger who debuted last September against the Mets and went 3-3 with a dinger off John Maine. Hit 3 bombs yesterday. Complete stud.

Adam Dunn: Off to a slow start, supposed subject of broadcaster Jeff Brantley�s recent remarks that the Reds were �quitters� who were anxious to go the restaurants after the game. Still draws walks and lots of trade speculation, fans believe he�s hitting into bad luck.

Edwin Encarnacion, 3B: Would you believe that he and Votto are out-homering anyone on the Mets� and everyone else on the Reds? They each have 7.

Paul Bako, C: Veteran with no stick. They also go with Javier Valentin: He also has no stick.

***
THE BENCH
Ryan Freel, Jerry Hairston, Scott Hatteberg, Norris Hopper, Juan Castro

***
THE BULLPEN
Lefties are Jeremy Affeldt and Kent Mercker.
Righties are Jared Burton, Gigantic Todd Coffey, Josh Fogg, Tackleberry Weathers. Francisco Cordero is the closer.

***
WHEN YOU GET RIGHT DOWN TO IT
The Reds are hard to figure out. Some good young players, some very old shitty players. Just had a major front-office shakeup after naming a new manager. They rank in the bottom half of the league in pitching and hitting, mainly because they are a mix of guys who completely suck with guys who are awesome.

***
METS WHO WERE REDS:
Schoeneweis
Feliciano (minors only)
Brady Clark

***

METS I HAD TO CHECK TO SEE IF THEY WERE ONCE REDS BUT WEREN�T
Casanova
Easley

***

REDS WHO WERE METS
Weathers
Keppinger

***
KNOW THY ENEMY'S ELITIST MESSAGE BOARD
http://www.redszone.com/
Membership in the "main" board is by 75% membership vote! Otherwise, post in the minors.

LET�S GO TO THE REPLAY:
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[Guest John Cougar Lunchbucket]

f-ing MLB Advanced Media.

[Guest AG/DC]

Norris-Hopper were a lethal team in Fist of Danger!

[Gwreck]

Sounds like the Reds are about a season or two away. They have Harang locked up for a while and lotsa money coming off the books for them with both Griffey and Dunn FA at the end of the year.

Nice report, thanks.

[Guest cooby]

Interesting category:

METS I HAD TO CHECK TO SEE IF THEY WERE ONCE REDS BUT WEREN�T
Casanova
Easley

[Guest John Cougar Lunchbucket]

Do you guys know what clip I wanted to show? Mr. Redleg -- their live action, vaguely Mr. Met-liike mascot, falls off a cart on the warning track and his head pops off. It's completely awesome.

[stevejrogers]

John Cougar Lunchbucket wrote: Do you guys know what clip I wanted to show? Mr. Redleg -- their live action, vaguely Mr. Met-liike mascot, falls off a cart on the warning track and his head pops off. It's completely awesome.

Would not be shocked if you hear of lawsuits against the Reds from parents of "traumatized" kids that sometimes you hear about when some kid goes off the track and sees Mickey Mouse or Donald Duck with their head off, bumming a cigarette or something else mundane at Disney Land.

[Guest John Cougar Lunchbucket]

um

[stevejrogers]

From Court TV, Matay v. Disneyland

[Guest AG/DC]

A Red can be crude:



A Red can be rude:



A Red can put you in the mood:

[Guest John Cougar Lunchbucket]

quick! before they take it away again!

[Guest AG/DC]

But can he crank out "Goo Goo Dolls" like Bronson?

[Guest John Cougar Lunchbucket]

What the hell happened to the Goo Goo Dolls. I thought "Superstar Car Wash" was OK in a post-grunge-y, Live kinda way. Then the guy shows up with half a tube of Pomade in his hair singing one lame ballad after the next.

[Guest AG/DC]

After "Iris," they became niche-rockers.

I think the guy has emotional issues, like he occasionally loses his voice or gets crippling writer's block or something, so every new reocrd gets launched as some sort of act of heroism, but they've defintitely walked the Brian Adams path of Rockers Releasing Almost Exclusively Ballads but That Still Carry Extra Cred 'Cuz We Used to Rock and Still Dress Like We Rock.

Bronson Arroyo wants to live on that path.

[metirish]

John Cougar Lunchbucket wrote: Do you guys know what clip I wanted to show? Mr. Redleg -- their live action, vaguely Mr. Met-liike mascot, falls off a cart on the warning track and his head pops off. It's completely awesome.

Saw it on the tube the other night , hilarious , although for a second I thought he might be hurt , then I resumed laughing.

[bmfc1]

Who the heck is Hal McCoy to talk about Shea this way! We can, not somebody from elsewhere (even if he is a HOFer):

http://www.journal-news.com/s/content/oh/story/sports/pro/reds/2008/05/08/ddn050808mccoyweb.html

[metirish]

bmfc1 wrote: Who the heck is Hal McCoy to talk about Shea this way! We can, not somebody from elsewhere (even if he is a HOFer): http://www.journal-news.com/s/content/oh/story/sports/pro/reds/2008/05/08/ddn050808mccoyweb.html

WOW , that's about as unprofessional as it gets.

[Guest AG/DC]

]By joe May 9, 2008 11:32 AM | Link to this sheas the best ballpak u fag

Now that's the type of posting we need over here.

[metirish]

Reading the comments section it seems Great American Ballpark is not much liked.

[Guest Triple Dee]

Very nice KTE, JCL!

(3D will be giving gratuitous complements to KTE's from here to the end of May as his 1st KTE is fast approaching)