Wifey Watch 2013

[Guest LeiterWagnerFasterStrongr]

We shied away from named YoungerPooper "Portia" because of the unfortunate you-named-her-after-a-car phonic association. The Bucks seemed to steer right into that there skid, though, didn't they?

[G-Fafif]

The current Mets Insider airing intermittently over the next two weeks on SNY is Wifeypalooza. Interviews with Missuses Hefner, Hawkins, Rice, Atchison and Murphy. Highlights:

--The wifey corps was like Murphette's "other bridesmaids" what with the way they did some necessary thing to her wedding dress. Where the hell were her real bridesmaids? Hittin' on Justin Turner?

--You're never without a babysitter, claims La Hef.

--Both Mrs. Murph and Mrs. Rice played college softball so they know just what it's like out there on the diamond.

--Dramatic music swelled when the Atchisons discussed their daughter being born with forearms that weren't quite as long as they were supposed to be and the Hefners raised funds for Oklahoma after the tornadoes.

--Hawk has been married since 1997 but has a son who's playing college basketball already (wasn't clear whether the lad is a prodigy or he didn't wait for wedlock to achieve paternity the way he waited to be in the majors to marry the present Mrs. H.)

--They all pose happily for Wifey team pictures but you know the hair and fingernails fly when the camera is put away. (Ugly stereotype -- perhaps they're all really the best of friends, though my own wifey wondered "If they're as close as they say, how come they weren't all interviewed together?")

Not seen on TV: Yesterday when Mr. & Mrs. Met and their handlers made the pregame rounds on field level, the regular folks of all ages cleared them a path and squealed with delight. They have supplanted Jerry Seinfeld's airport cart people as Our Royalty.

[Guest themetfairy]

Hawk has been married since 1997 but has a son who's playing college basketball already

At first I couldn't figure out how Niese could be old enough to have a son who's playing college BBall....

[G-Fafif]

themetfairy wrote: Hawk has been married since 1997 but has a son who's playing college basketball already At first I couldn't figure out how Niese could be old enough to have a son who's playing college BBall....

Mrs. Hawkins refers to LaTroy as "Hawk". The Nieses kept their noses out of this show.

[Guest John Cougar Lunchbucket]

I don't know about you guys but I find short-armed chicks kinda cute.

[Guest themetfairy]

G-Fafif wrote: themetfairy wrote: Hawk has been married since 1997 but has a son who's playing college basketball already At first I couldn't figure out how Niese could be old enough to have a son who's playing college BBall.... Mrs. Hawkins refers to LaTroy as "Hawk". The Nieses kept their noses out of this show.

I did figure that out. It just took a minute.

[Farmer Ted]

Mrs. Edgin. Out there on facebook.

Facebook

WWW.FACEBOOK.COM

[Edgy MD]

Ceetar wrote: New Met Kyle Johnson has a wifey (or gf? who knows) Susan Wilson(susanwilson01 on TwitteR) Sears Tower off-days The book she's reading, The Package Deal

What happened to Kyle Johnson?

Meanwhile, big week for marginal Mets. Josh Satin, Kirk NIeuwenhuis, and (SOB!!) Anthony Recker all getting wedded this week.

[Guest John Cougar Lunchbucket]

Josh is to wed Alyson Murrow Nov. 7. If my sleuthing is to be trusted, Allyson looks like this and works for a LA hedge fund.

They're looking for gifts from Bllomie's, Geary's and Williams Sonoma. Expensive tastes they got.

[Benjamin Grimm]

I hope the kids get her eyebrows.

[Guest John Cougar Lunchbucket]

Is this who I think it is?

[Edgy MD]

Melissa?

[Guest John Cougar Lunchbucket]

It's Molly Beers, who's evidently (??) been avoiding WifeyWatchers all these years by going by using that name to avoid detection under her real name, Alexandra Beers or as she prefers to be known, Lexy.

Under that name we can discover our First Lady was a top collegiate volleyball player until suffering a back injury and all sortsa stuff.

[Edgy MD]

Very clever, Lexy. But you can't outwit the Bucket.

[Guest John Cougar Lunchbucket]

You got me!

[Farmer Ted]

A bunch of Wifey's on Lexy's Friends list.
Mr. Bucket's Gold Mine.

Lexy Beers

WWW.FACEBOOK.COM

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Lexy Beers is on Facebook. Join Facebook to connect with Lexy Beers and others you may know. Facebook gives people the power to share and makes the world more open and connected.

[Farmer Ted]

Hold everything...who's this guy?

John Huelskamp

WWW.FACEBOOK.COM

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John Huelskamp is on Facebook. Join Facebook to connect with John Huelskamp and others you may know. Facebook gives people the power to share and makes the world more open and connected.

[Edgy MD]

Looks like a different layday to me. Bigger conk, from where I sit.

[Guest John Cougar Lunchbucket]

Oh man. Maybe Lexy is Molly's sister? Lexy Beers is "friends" with Muffy's wife, Dave Racianello and what looks to be David's brother Matt. This Molly is hard to pin down.

Oh, what led me there was this, from Hovvey's chick:

http://instagram.com/p/bP8_Nehkpu/

[Farmer Ted]

Molly, Mira Costa HS, class of 2002
Lexy, Mira Costa HS, class of 2001

Hot sisters!

[Guest John Cougar Lunchbucket]

Ted, I'm promoting you to Detective.

[Farmer Ted]

John Huelskamp. He's no David Wright. Perhaps has the manscaping down, but he's no David.

[Guest John Cougar Lunchbucket]

Yeah I was a little bit concerned that was DW's pelvis.

[Farmer Ted]

Lexy Beers has a career connection to this company. Daddy?

http://www.rtbeers.com/

[Guest John Cougar Lunchbucket]

I'm gonna start a drinking company called M.T. Beers.

[Guest LeiterWagnerFasterStrongr]

My scotch-y craft brew company, P T Beers would be interested in a strategic partnership.

[Guest John Cougar Lunchbucket]

Anthony Recker ?@Anthony_Recker 3 Nov Getting married today to the most beautiful, caring, and genuine person I've ever known! I love you @KellyShepardson

Kelly Shepardson ?@KellyShepardson 16m Goin to the redwoods and we're..gonna get maaaarried@Anthony_Recker

[Edgy MD]

That wedding took place right after Hahn's team joined with a village of resourceful ewoks to take out the shield generator protecting the new Death Star.

[Guest John Cougar Lunchbucket]

Kelly Shepardson ?@KellyShepardson 3m A mouth full of hors d'oeuvres and a kiss from my groom = happy bride!

[Guest John Cougar Lunchbucket]

Oh the Internet is filthy with romance of the reserve infielders.

This must be Tyrna's squeeze, Kourtney.

Kourtney ?@court_with_a_K 17h Look who I found! Congrats @KellyShepardson & @Anthony_Recker! Can't wait to dance the night away w/ you & @redturn2