Day Off Doggerel

[Frayed Knot]

LeiterWagnerFasterStrongr wrote: Benjamin Grimm wrote: Some of these seem to have way too many syllables. Indeed. Somewhere, that Bret fella's blowing an aneurysm.

We can only hope.

[batmagadanleadoff]

.

[batmagadanleadoff]

B for Berroa,
who's no Willie Keeler.
He hit where they was
and he ain't no base stealer.

[Guest LeiterWagnerFasterStrongr]

Y is "Ye Gods,
Won't these injuries stop?"
From the spurs in an elbow
To a sick hamstring pop

[G-Fafif]

Z is for zero
Fun in October
Others sprayed bubbly
Our guys stayed sober

[Valadius]

That was one of my favorite threads EVER. I went through the whole alphabet with Mets quatrains. Here's my version circa 2005:

A is for Agee The Miracle Man Whose diving catches Thrilled many a fan. B is for Backman Hard-nosed as hell Rarely went deep But played the game well. C is for Carter Known as "The Kid" Played with a smile That he never hid. D is for Darling Smart as can be Ladies would scream As he worked 1-2-3. E is for Elster Much talent untapped His biggest mistake? He wouldn't adapt. F is for Franco The better of two He gave us a show Whenever he threw. G is for Gooden Known as Doc K A spectacular kid Let his skills waste away. H, for Hernandez Though there have been three Mex was the best We all can agree. I is for Izzy Who once pitched at Shea The trade for Bill Taylor - The end of Gen K. J is for Johnson HoJo to most Kept us alive With Darryl a ghost. K is for Koosman But we called him Koos. With him on the mound, We'd win more than lose. L is for Leiter Our Jersey Boy His starts would often Fill us with joy. M's for McGraw Boy, Tug could relieve His most famous quote? Ya Gotta Believe. N is for Niemann Gave Cashen a toast He did the least, Celebrated the most. O's for Orosco Was traded for Koos For many a year Were hitters confused. P's for Piazza Our very own Mike With one mighty swing Our offense would spike. Q is the question That we all still ask Will we see a no-hitter? Can we at last bask? R is for Reyes Who gives us a burst Like lightning he sprints From home plate to first. S is for Stengel, Seaver and Straw. One made us laugh, Two, gape in awe. T is for Teufel Who shuffled at bat When Dibble threw in Ol' Tuff knocked him flat. U is for Unser Played center quite well We got him for Tug But soon said farewell. V is for Valentine, Ol' Bobby V. Mr. Mustachio Filled us with glee. W's for Wright Who crushes the ball If he keeps it up He'll enter the Hall. X is for Esix Quick as can be After last season We set him free. Y is for Youngblood Was on some bad teams Once, he had hair His forehead now gleams. Z is for Zachry Fought with Ron Cey He was no Seaver Still, was okay.

[batmagadanleadoff]

.

[G-Fafif]

D is for Dickey
Who R.A. Buff pitcher
And if his knucker keeps working,
A rotation stitcher

[Guest Edgy DC]

B is for Bascik
Lost a job in Dallas
Swears that his tweeting
Wasn't meant in malice

[batmagadanleadoff]

.

[batmagadanleadoff]

P for Pacella.
How'd he pitch at all
with a cap on his head
twas two sizes too small?

[batmagadanleadoff]

.

[batmagadanleadoff]

.

[Guest Swan Swan H]

This was my original A, but I wasn't sure about the rhyme. Works better with a Joisey accent.

A is for Agee
Best known for two catches
For one catch he dives
For the other he stretches

[G-Fafif]

F is for Francoeur
Formerly the Braves'
Then: Soulless bastard
But now? Jeffrey Saves!

[batmagadanleadoff]

Swan Swan H wrote: This was my original A, but I wasn't sure about the rhyme. Works better with a Joisey accent. A is for Agee Best known for two catches For one catch he dives For the other he stretches

A is for Agee's famed
World Series catches.
A stretch, then a dive,
he caught them in batches.

[Guest LeiterWagnerFasterStrongr]

N is for Niese
With prominent beak
And a hook that makes millionaire
Strongmen look weak

[batmagadanleadoff]

.

[batmagadanleadoff]

.

[batmagadanleadoff]

.

[batmagadanleadoff]

.

[Guest Edgy DC]

J is for Johan
Though sounded as Y
Tossed meatballs in Phillie
They lit up the sky

P is for Pelfrey
Who threw like an ace
But April is past now
And so is first place

[batmagadanleadoff]

T is for Timo,
the fastest Met.
But not when it mattered
the most, I regret.